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Friday, 10 February 2017

Review Round-up: Things I Started, But Never Finished.


Review Round-up: Things I Started, But Never Finished.

I dropped a lot of stuff this year. With limited time available to me and an even more limited attention span, I literally can't watch every television show that catches my eye through to completion, let alone play every game, which requires a much bigger time (and money) commitment.

Here are five things I started but never managed to finish.




Riverdale.

I went into Riverdale on the assumption that I wouldn't be able to get very far in it, but it was a lot worse than I imagined it'd be. The idea of a dark and gritty Archie adaptation was always ridiculous, but ridiculous ideas have sometimes yielded some really good things, so even though I was ninety percent sure it would be terrible, I was willing to give it a chance.

The first episode, however, was not only boring but filled to the brim with incredibly grating characters. The tone for the story is set when Betty breathlessly tells Archie that over the summer, a writer gave her a quote about how youth is fleeting, to which he solemnly replies that he's been writing poetry, and that it's just so real, you know? At which point I immediately decided I hated everyone.

The one shimmering light in it all is probably Veronica, the only engaging member of the cast, and the only one who seems to have much of a personality. That's not enough to keep me watching, so I dropped the show after the first episode.


Star Ocean: Integrity and Faithlessness.

I have been enjoying Star Ocean somewhat, but it suffers from the problem that its story, at least at the beginning, just isn't that engaging. It kind of coasts by on stock JRPG devices -- bandits are attacking an idyllic village, a magical young girl shows up -- without doing anything to get me invested in the world or the characters.

I'll probably return to it at some point, but my attention drifted away from it pretty quickly, so the chances of me finishing it and getting a review up are pretty slim. Which is a shame: It's pretty, has good gameplay, and even has a pretty nice pace, but it's so lacking in basic story fundamentals that there's nothing to sustain my interest.


Luke Cage.

Easily the best thing on this list, I was actually really enjoying Luke Cage -- but it's very densely plotted, and often quite slow, and once the main villain, Cottonmouth, got killed off, my interest rapidly waned.

I do plan to get back to Luke Cage at some point, but it exemplifies the problem with Marvel's Netflix fare: They are quite grim, quite hyper-realist, and often slogs to get through. Daredevil had this problem as well, and Jessica Jones and Daredevil S2 both suffered from it near their middles.

On the bright side, if I never review Luke Cage, then I have no obligation to watch Iron Fist at all, which is good, because I don't want to watch Iron Fist. At all.


Beyond.

Beyond is about a guy who wakes up from a possibly alien-induced coma and finds he has psychic powers, which is a really cliche plot, but potentially a fun one, so I thought I'd check it out.

The first episode was not especially inspiring, though, being just kind of -- bland. Not bad, but not good, and not really anything else either. Some conspiracy plot threads are introduced, some shenanigans with a psychic woman, a best friend who's betrayed the main character, and so on.

It wasn't enough to convince me to watch past the first episode, anyway.


Supernatural S12.

I just can't do it, guys. I can't cope with the rest of this series of Supernatural, I just can't. It's so terrible, and it's so boring, and I just can't do it anymore.

The second half of the series started recently, and I haven't watched any of it, and honestly, I'm not going to. I just can't be having with it.

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