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Tuesday, 29 July 2014

Teen Wolf S4E6: Orphaned.


Man, my stomach hurts. Not getting a burger from that Fish and Chip shop again, that's for sure.

Teen Wolf
S4E6: Orphaned.


This episode, we finally see Kate again. As the episode opens, she's enjoying a tape somebody made for her, and somehow managed to smuggle into her car while she was sleeping – it sounds like a history documentary about the Hales, although I can't imagine that an actual historian made it, unless it's possibly an evil werewolf historian.

There's a timeskip of indeterminate length forward, and Kate and her Berserkers have killed a bunch of the assassins coming to kill her, leaving one alive to question. He knows nothing about the Benefactor, and nothing about the tape – but he does know that another group, some people called the Orphans who 'look like teenagers', also received a similar tape. Any further negotiations are shut off when a man rudely shoots Kate in the stomach, and she loses control, jaguaring out and tearing both him and her interviewee apart. Also, seemingly eating the latter.

Finger-lickin' good.


Credits roll!

At the school, the Coach is angrily remarking that Garrett the Assassin is off the team, because – well, actually I'm not sure. Because his girlfriend's been arrested? Because Coach knows he stabbed someone on the opposite team, and that's just not on? Either way, Scott's father is there, apologising profusely for not showing up at the game, as are the Sheriff and Parrish, arresting Freshman Hitman Lass. She sees Parrish's name badge and makes the connection that he's the 'Jordan Parrish' off the dead pool, and thus another potential target.

As soon as Scott's father sees the thermal wire, he goes to question Freshhitlass, as it's an unusual weapon used in over a dozen murders. He also mentions that she doesn't have parents, and alludes to that being why 'they' are called 'the Orphans', which – I mean, that is what people whose parents are both dead are called, I mean, he's not wrong, but there's clearly meant to be some deeper meaning here.

Luckily, Evil Lacrosse Villain seems fine. Convulsing, throwing up miniature tennis balls (or possibly those lemon-flavoured Solero pops) and screaming, but you know. Fine. Derek and Stiles aren't able to hold him down, but Peter arrives and lays him flat with a punch, revealing that he's been getting stronger and regaining his werewolf powers, even as Derek seems to be losing his own. I don't even remember Peter losing any of his werewolf powers, so this is all a bit confusing to me.

Deaton makes an incision in the lad's chest, letting out the wolfsbane, and he starts repeating the same 'the sun, the moon, the truth' mantra the other dead werewolves had been saying. Deaton mentions that it's a Buddhist saying – making me realise that Americans or possibly just Deaton have a very strange way of pronouncing 'Buddhist', with an elongated 'ooo' diphthong instead of a short 'oo' monophthong – 'Three things cannot be long hidden: The Sun, the Moon, and the Truth.'

Well, hey, gives him something to think about that isn't
the yellow smoke billowing from his chest.

(Incidentally, I looked up the quote. It's not a direct quote from Siddharta Gautama, but it is a paraphrased, simplified version of something he said.)

This somehow leads to Peter and Derek to assume, somehow, that Satomi the Probably Dead Japanese Werewolf who knew Kira's mother is somehow involved.

Scott and Liam, meanwhile, break into Freshhitman's locker, and find in it a bag full of money. Scott lies, saying it's not got anything in it, because apparently his mother's in dire financial straits. I don't – really … She's a nurse? Nursing is a pretty highly paid profession. I mean, a nurse of her seniority earns a salary of about 40k a year here, and I checked, it's not much lower for a nurse in the US. Did they have some kind of massive outgoing I wasn't aware of last series?

Scott also is bewildered.

(While I'm being confused about this, Liam abandons his best mate while they're running, and promptly finds himself hit by a car, stabbed, and kidnapped by Garrett. Good job, Liam. Sterling work.)

At school, Malia is getting picked on by a teacher again, dear god who is running this school why are these teachers not being punished, before leaving class due to hearing Derek creepily whispering her name from the doorway. He needs to warn Evil Lacrosse Villain's pack, and he knows they meet in the woods – and nobody knows the woods better than Malia.

Stiles and Lydia talk to Parrish, who seems genuinely stunned that he's on the dead pool, and even more stunned that he's worth so much, but Stiles and Lydia are more concerned with getting the third cipher key.


Have. You. Tried. BOYD.
Have. You. Tried. ERIKA.
There is a clear pattern with the keys, try both of those.

Alternately, as people have suggested it could be people killed by the Nogitsune: Have you tried RHYS? Have you compiled a list of people killed by the Nogitsune and tried out all of their names?

At school, Garrett contacts Scott with his demands: He wants the money, and he wants Violet, or else Scott won't see Liam again. Or, one supposes, at least not alive. Presumably, Liam's not on the dead pool, then, as it'd make more sense to just kill him and kidnap someone else who Scott would give these things for. Like, you know, his totally un-superpowered mother and father.

Anyway, Garrett's plan is to have Scott stop an armoured car, and he'll deal with the rest. Should be simple enough. I'm sure nobody will die in this endeavour.

Yes, I'm sure the hoodie will obscure your identity from your
father and your best friend's father, Scott.

(Meanwhile, in a short scene with the hashtag 'CleverParrish', Parrish, Lydia and Stiles visit Eichen House, where the subject of how truly barbaric private healthcare is comes up again, to see Meredith. They get in to see her with a little bit of blackmail, but Meredith doesn't want to tell them the third cipher key, because apparently the Benefactor is fairly firmly against the idea.)

Also, Meredith screams and makes Lydia bleed from the ear.
Bit rude, can't really blame her, though.

Scott and Garrett are somewhat beaten to the punch, as the car has already been stopped in spectacular and bloody fashion by the Berserkers. Garrett shows off with his double-bladed spear, yelling the odds and, predictably, gets murdered until he is dead of murder, because a squishy human with a nice spear is still a squishy human.

(If he is a squishy human. Didn't the assassin say they 'look' like teenagers?)

Scott doesn't fare much better, and he wakes up with Deaton and Chris, having a bone knife pulled out of him. He says that Violet probably knows where Liam is, and Deaton says that the knife might be able to help with that.

… And then in the next scene we get the moment I've been dreading this entire series, where Derek drops a slur into conversation as casually as if he were talking about the weather. Just – go to hell, Jeff Davis, who wrote this episode. Go to hell however many people let it get through all these stages of production and on air. Go to hell anybody who tries to whinge 'Oh, but it's not a slur over here in Ameeeeeriiiiiiicaaaaaaa,' because no, taking a medical term that is still in frequent usage and using it as an insult, when nearly the entirety of the rest of the English speaking world views it as a repulsive slur – yes, yes that is a slur, and no amount of ethnocentric whining about how it's so mean that Americans don't get a free pass to be bigots is going to make that not so.

Yes, I've had this argument before. Yes, I am still bitter about it. When I last mentioned it, actually the response from Americans was overwhelmingly good and sensitive, so kudos for that, but I am still bitter and this does still make me nauseous, and if this review weren't already very late, I would stop writing it and go vent my anger on something.

Derek and Malia have a conversation. It's dull, I didn't listen to the rest of it, not going to bother talking about it, sure it was just them running through a list of the worst words they could think of. Let's move on.

Much more interesting is Liam having his The Dark Knight Rises moment. Apparently Liam's father gives the worst advice, incidentally. Yes, tell your son with a mental health issue that the only way to deal with his explosive anger is to hurt himself or hurt others. And yes, the phrasing is 'kids', but Liam's fifteen. He is a kid. The kidliest.

As Scott and Chris reach where the Berserkers (and probably Kate) are holed up, Derek and Malia continue to do nothing interesting. Inside the place of flappy plastic, things go South for Chris and Scott about as quickly as you'd expect them to, given that the Berserkers seem to be functionally invincible. Chris actually tries punching them, despite being a regular human, which I think just shows how much he's lost control of the situation. They nearly kill Chris before Kate stops them, but unfortunately, Scott has already discovered that Violet is quite dead. 

Confused looking Berserkers.

Apparently, Stiles and Lydia have tried those names I mentioned above, as they say they tried the names of every dead person they could think of, and this pleases me. Stiles posits that the third key might be someone who isn't dead yet, but will be quite soon, and Lydia starts trying to sense who it might be. I'm sure the answer will be completely benign, probably just some elderly man in the hospital who's ready to pass on and – wait, no, it's Derek.

Wow, I would've been way more torn up about that twenty minutes ago. Ah, well, never mind.

It successfully decodes the last third of the cipher, which includes both Liam (surprisingly) and Meredith (less surprisingly). Liam's not going to die just yet, though, because Scott has just rescued him. Meredith isn't so lucky, as Parrish tells Lydia that she hung herself in her room. In the aftermath of this series of events, Scott decides that nobody else is going to die, and takes it upon himself to make sure of this.

But there's still that bag of money to deal with. He and Stiles empty it to count it and in so doing find the tape mentioned at the start of this episode.

Down in the sewers, though, Peter has found Kate, and as the episode closes they form an alliance, although one which I doubt the efficacy of.

So, that's the sixth episode. Like yesterday's Falling Skies episode, it wasn't a super-striking one, but it does mark a change in the series, with Scott taking a more proactive role, the new Peter-Kate alliance, the dead pool fully discovered, Derek's future death looming, and the mysterious historical documentary tapes now in play. I do look forward to seeing what happens next week.

(And please, if you feel the urge to rapturously sing the virtues of casual bigotry at me, repress that urge. It was boring and offensive the first time somebody tried it, Lord only knows the tenth or eleventh time is not going to be the magic repetition that changes that.) 

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